Scholar of arcane Anglospheric Cultism, the eminent James C. Bennett of Miskatonic University, has turned up a disturbing fact after translating an ancient text. In a closed session address to Foreign Policy Research Institute, Bennett reported his findings:
H. P. Lovecraft got it garbled: It’s “In his house in Riyadh great Cthulhu lies sleeping.” That’s why the Saudi Whahabis hate all other varieties of Islam. Their form is really Cthulhu-worship.
Naturally the Saudi ambassador dismissed this as:
Obviously just another Zionist smear campaign and quite clearly racism against Middle Eastern people. So what if a few of us smell strongly of fish, commune with extraplanular creatures and have tentacles under our burqas?
Alarming stuff.
[Editor’s note: you need to have read H. P . Lovecraft’s horror stories to have the slightest idea what this means]
