Samizdata

The irony is so thick that you could not chop through it with an axe.

Amid all the hand-wringing and condemnations over incidents which may or may not have taken place at the Abu Ghraib prison in Iraq, there does not appear to be even a bat-squeak of high moral tone over rituals of abuse and humiliation that are most definitely occuring in British schools: [note: link may not be available to non-UK readers.]

DOGS are visiting at least 100 secondary schools in England and Wales to search pupils for drugs, particularly cannabis. In some areas a private security firm is providing dogs and handlers to check children.

Sniffer dogs are viewed by some head teachers and governors as a softer option than random drug tests.

Well, they are also a softer option than the ducking stool but that does not justify their deployment. Nor are such degrading exercises made any more palatable by spoonfuls of sugar:

Annette Croft, the head teacher, said that there had been unease among some pupils when they were lined up to be sniffed by the dogs. She told Druglink magazine that the exercise was “a very mellow, humane and civilised response to the threat of drugs”.

Priceless! How about a mellow, humane and civilised response to the threat of drug warriors and their unquestioning footsoldiers. Really, is there any order these people would not obey?

Parents were asked to sign a letter of consent to the searches, which is usual in most schools where dogs are used. Any pupils who do not consent are searched by hand.

See, participation is voluntary so that is all okay then.

Only four pupils were picked out, including one who provided information about cannabis smoking on the school bus.

Confess and you will be spared, my child.

I am sincerely at a loss to comprehend the volcanic eruption of outrage and revulsion over the treatment of Iraqi prisoners when schoolchildren in this country are subjected to ritual abuse and humiliation as a matter of policy.

I expect there will be no shortage of angry respondents to point out that there is no comparison. They are right. The Iraqi prisoners were, at least, adults and while that does not excuse or justify brutal treatment, one should similarly spare a thought for just how intimidating it must be for children to be lined up by burly security men and set upon by dogs.

No, they are not being hooded, chained, beaten or kicked in the nether regions by belligerent squaddies but I get the feeling that the overlords of the drug war would gleefully institute such measures and, if they did, that the otherwise squeamish and human-rights obsessed British press would report on their progress with equanimity and no small degree of satisfaction.

Shock treatment, you see. It’s for their own good.

In future, Judges are going to have to be less judgmental:

Judges have been issued with guidelines to encourage political correctness in court. Advice sent to all judges and magistrates in England and Wales, tackles misleading social stereotypes that have led to a high-profile judicial gaffes.

Note of explanation: ‘gaffe’ is a term applied to instances of public figures accidentally letting the truth slip out.

Judges are told the term “coloured” should never be used, to avoid using the description “oriental” and to take care that “British” is not used as shorthand for white, English or Christian. They are also given a definition of asylum-seeker, and are reminded that women “remain disadvantaged” in society. “The disadvantages women can suffer range from inadequate recognition of their contribution to the home or society to an underestimation of the problems women face as a result of gender bias,” the guidance says.

Somebody should really slap a Preservation Order on these ‘guidelines’. They have a unique, period 1970’s charm all of their own.

The term “asylum-seeker” is associated with people without a genuine claim to be refugees, and is almost pejorative, the advice said.

Hilarious! We used to use the word ‘immigrants’ until the PC brigade got it banned for being offensive. ‘Asylum-seeker’ was the neutral replacement term. This country is institutionally anti-euphamist.

And judges are advised not to overlook the use of gender-based, racist or “homophobic” stereotyping as an “evidential short cut”. They are also warned against using words that imply an “evaluation” of the sexes, however subtle: for instance, “man and wife”, “girl” (unless speaking of a child) and “businessmen”.

The judiciary is to undergo regular training sessions.

Where they will learn that they are bourgeois counter-revolutionaries and lackeys of the capitalist running dogs.

Here is a list of ‘verboten’ terms:

Coloured: An offensive term that should never be used

Oriental: The term should be avoided because it is imprecise and may be considered racist or offensive

British: Care should be taken to use the term “British” in an inclusive sense, to include all citizens. Exclusionary use of the term as a synonym for white, English, or Christian is unacceptable

Postman: Use postal worker instead

Right on! It is about time that anti-postworkerism was confronted and smashed.

Are you married?: Intrusive and irrelevant

Yes, especially in divorce proceedings.

Mentally handicap: Judges should use instead “learning disabilities” and “people with disabilities”.

Feel free to chip in with further useful suggestions.

There must be a comedy sketch in this:

West Yorkshire Police were guilty of sex discrimination in refusing to recruit a male-to-female transsexual, law lords have ruled.
The five law lords ruled unanimously that the woman, Miss A, was unlawfully discriminated against in breach of the Sex Discrimination Act.

They upheld a decision by the Court of Appeal last November.

West Yorkshire Police had argued that Miss A would not be able to carry out certain duties, such as body searches.

Lord Bingham said that, under European law, transsexuals were entitled to the same protection against discrimination as any other individual and to be recognised as belonging to their ‘acquired gender’.

Not to mention endless jokes about truncheons.