We are developing the social individualist meta-context for the future. From the very serious to the extremely frivolous... lets see what is on the mind of the Samizdata people.

Samizdata, derived from Samizdat /n. - a system of clandestine publication of banned literature in the USSR [Russ.,= self-publishing house]

Bunches of useless tossers

From about the victory of 1997 – in the last few years of the 1990s and the first few years of the 2000s – the British Labour Party strode with immense power, strength, and confidence. It won huge victories over its enemies, asserted itself with great strength and confidence, but was not afraid of getting a little dirty when this was necessary to achieve its agenda. It was not always popular with everyone, but it looked unbeatable and invincible. It and its leadership were not liked by everyone, but what had been achieved had to be respected. By the time of the defeat of 2015, though, Labour was a pathetic shadow of what it had been. After the defeat, it seemed inexplicable that anyone had every thought victory was possible, athough many had (strangely) predicted it. Led and managed by incompetent losers, it was very hard to see a way forward. Although the leaders who had overtly brought it to this point had been deposed, the culture of failure and incompetence remained in place, and their replacements looked likely to be worse.

From about the victory of 1997 – in the last few years of the 1990s and the first few years of the 2000s – the Australian cricket team strode with immense power, strength, and …

24 comments to Bunches of useless tossers

  • DICK R

    The “enemies” it won those victories over were the British people, who had their noses rubbed in diversity
    as hordes of third world immigrants turned English cities into festering sores ,children raped and abused
    as the frightened Police looked on , electoral fraud running rife in Socialist local authorities.

  • Regional

    ‘The Astrayan Krikit team were murdered in Broad daylight’.

  • Regional

    El Gordo’s debt legacy will haunt Britain for decades.

  • It really came down to that old thing of “socialists running out of money”. In a time of boom, they weren’t putting anything into reserves. They were spending money like crazy. They borrowed by using things like PFI to take it off the books. Eventually, time was going to catch up with them.

  • James Waterton

    That is a disgusting, below the belt slur. Yes, the fourth test was a total clusterfuck. Yes, the Australian team richly deserves all the mockery it’s copping from the rampantly triumphant old enemy. But to liken us to NuLab – unforgivable.

    That being said, the speaker is inadvertently sliming their own team’s admirable achievements by drawing such a parallel. If the Baggy Greens are post-Blair NuLab, then that must mean the victorious English side are David Cameron’s Tories. Might want to work on that metaphor a little longer, I’d say.

  • But the Aussies were more Sh’ite than an Ayatollah. They were James. No ifs or buts. That was classic pantage.

  • Mr Ed

    Omelettes are off in the Tourists’ kitchen, as they can’t beat eggs. This tour is disappointing, I have an expectation that the hapless England team will collapse like the Bielefeld Viaduct under a Grand Slam bowling attack, whilst the bowlers feed runs to the tourists, like it used to be in the old days, whilst the hapless England Captain mutters excuses. Frankly, it looks as if the less bad team won, but neither is made up of sporting Paladins, just blokes who happen to be good enough to be selected for national teams.

    It is grossly unfair to compare a bunch of sledging, incompetent yobs to the most determined enemy England has ever faced, the Labour Party, and I include the Luftwaffe and the whole Wehrmacht and Soviet Armed Forces in that list, as they had not pressed their attacks so close for so long.

  • Jake Haye

    From about the victory of 1997 – in the last few years of the 1990s and the first few years of the 2000s – the British Labour Party strode with immense power, strength, and confidence.

    Nah, they just found their ideal faceman Tony Blair. The BBC did the rest.

  • Regional

    The Strayan Krikit team should dine a Freddy Flintoff’s fish and chip van they might pick up a few tips on how to play krikit instead of sledging instead and being sooks.

  • lucklucky

    Maybe the left doesn’t need the Labour.

  • The Wobbly Guy

    It’s not that bad, isn’t it? After all, didn’t the Aussies whitewash the English 5-0 just two years back? It seems home ground advantage is huge, and I would be wary of hyperbole from either side based on just one Test series.

  • Nicholas (Self-Sovereignty) Gray

    We Aussies must create a royal commission into this! Tony Abbott, our leader, could regain lost kudos by stirring up Australia to the goal of reclaiming cricket’s Highest prize! We will have our Revenge, and a glorious 1000 year reign!!!

  • mojo

    Wait – your highest prize is a bunch of burnt sticks?

  • J.M. Heinrichs

    PM Abbott should commission Mr Bill Shorten to execute an inquiry into this sad disaster; it is understood that Mr Shorten has relevant expertise in these matters.


  • Regional

    In about 1868 or there abouts a Koori cricket team toured Britain and cleaned the Pommies up. At my local place of public entertainment certain individuals were asked to leave and one threw a full can of beer threw through reinforced glass and put a neat hole the size of the end a beer can threw it. Their eyesight is 100/100 so they can see how the bowler is holding the ball when he begins his run up.
    Cricket is a funny game.

  • Nicholas (Self-Sovereignty) Gray

    Regional, I have never been sure of the ethnic origin of the first team. They were called native, but might that refer to their having been born in Australia, instead of being immigrant settlers?
    To the rest, we still make fire around here by rubbing sticks together! Matchsticks are for wusses!

  • James Waterton

    But the Aussies were more Sh’ite than an Ayatollah. They were James. No ifs or buts. That was classic pantage.

    Nowhere did I deny this, nor offer any its or buts. I don’t think anyone would embarrass themselves by pretending otherwise.

  • Regional

    Rolf Harris the only Aussie not out by lunch.
    Nicholas, real men use Bics and why do you have to introduce logic?

  • In ’93 I saw Rolf Harris at the end of year Nottingham University party (we also had Danii Minogue and a lot of Foster’s lager – they sponsored it). It was fun but that evaporated nastily when I found out he was a kiddie-fiddler.

    Oh, Ozymandias!

  • Nicholas (Self-Sovereignty) Gray

    A quibble about the title of this column- isn’t it a tautology? Is there such a thing as a useFUL tosser? If so, can you give an example?

  • Mr Ed

    Example: Steve Jobs?

  • mojo

    Pommie, presumably, comes from pomade? Which the big wigs would sniff to cut down on the stench from the streets?

  • I’ve never heard “pomade” given as an explanation before. As for the origin of “Pom” or “pommy”, there are two explanations often given.

    The first is that it is often claimed that convicts being sent to Australia wore uniforms with the letters “POHM” (Prisoner of her/his Majesty) or alternately “POME” (Prisoner of Mother England) written on the uniform. This explanation is certainly false, as there is no evidence that such uniforms ever existed. In addition, the use of acronyms of this form was not common before the twentieth century. (Similarly, the explanation that the word “posh” is short for “port out, starboard home” is also almost certainly false).

    The second is that rhyming slang has been used to turn the word “immigrant” into “pomegranate”, and that this has been further shortened (as is usual with Cockney/Australian rhyming slang) by removing the rhyming syllable, leaving “pom” or “pommy” behind. Occasionally I heard this further embellished by the observation that the sunburned cheeks of British immigrants arriving in Australia looked like pomegranates, hence strengthening this connections. Although the rhyme is imperfect, I find this explanation quite plausible – this is a construction typical of Australian English – but as to whether it is true, we don’t really know.