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I come not to praise Fearon

Yesterday’s issue of “The Sun” (Saturday July 6th) has an article by John Askill “Gipsy burglar sues farmer”, one of the more appalling items I’ve read recently. The first line says it all: “The burglar wounded by Tony Martin is suing the farmer on Legal Aid, it was revealed yesterday.”

A few years ago I dealt with a computer sales guy from Atlanta, Georgia, an ex-US Army man who married a Belfast woman. I think this place was too much for him because after a few years he got divorced and went home to Atlanta. But I’ve always remembered some advice he gave me on dealing with burglars: “Use the Double Tap”.

He became proficient at the technique while on active duty. It’s a great small arms method of ensuring your target doesn’t get up again. Like most really good ideas, it is dead simple.

Your aim point is the center of the burglar’s torso; you pull the trigger twice, very quickly. That’s where the “double tap” name comes from. The first bullet is likely to hit mid body and dissuade him from further action. The recoil from the first shot pulls your aim point upwards such the second is a head shot. If executed correctly it’s an easy kill. Good ol’ US Army small arms training there!

He was advised by a police friend not to use more than two shots if at all possible. More might be considered “excessive force”. You should only use a third round if the lowlife is still breathing,. Make sure it’s not in the back so you won’t be accused of firing while he’s trying to get away.

If the body falls out of the door, drag it across the threshold before the police arrive.

Farmer Martin’s big mistake was leaving Fearon breathing. He certainly couldn’t be any worse off, and besides… dead men don’t sue.

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