We are developing the social individualist meta-context for the future. From the very serious to the extremely frivolous... lets see what is on the mind of the Samizdata people.

Samizdata, derived from Samizdat /n. - a system of clandestine publication of banned literature in the USSR [Russ.,= self-publishing house]

An interesting personal view of the Middle East

Due to the ghastly atrocity in Israel, there has been an upsurge in declaiming about that particular ongoing festival of horrors. Will Wilkinson on The Fly Bottle gives his views not specifically on the latest acts of futile psychopathy by Hamas but rather on why he finds it hard to to take sides at all.

Agree with him or not, it is refreshing to read something different amidst the seething sea of punditry.

Another lead points to Pakistan

This Teheran Times story says that two of their nuclear scientists have been rearrested on suspicion of something or other to do with Afghanistan. Can the two stories be linked?

A Taliban Idyll by Fred

A Taliban Idyll

by Fred Thornett

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Act One, Scene One

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Imagine the following. You are looking at the door of a crude mud hut in which an impoverished Afghan peasant and his wives dwell somewhere in the Caves District of Afghanistan in the week after the fall of the last Taliban stronghold.

Enter left, skinny bearded chap with smirk, turban and beard who declaims in Arabic:

“Excuse me, Impoverished Afghan Peasant victim of American Imperialism, I am the famous Muslim fundament hero, Osama bin Liner. Can my illustrious friends and I sleep in your barn for the night to hide from the evil agents of the Great Satan? We will pay you ten thousand of these lovely muslim-green Taliban banknotes for your help.”

Reply in broken Arabic by suddenly smiling Impoverished Afghan Peasant,

“Certainly oh great one. Such an honour! You are most welcome indeed, good sirs! And I will send you my favourite goat to help your excellencies pass the night in comfort!! Will your honours partake of some humble, peasant-type refreshments before you sleep?”

Ushers honoured guests with many flourishes off stage to barn.

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Act One, Scene Two.

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Impoverished Afghan Peasant in sotto voce‚ to first woman in burqa.

“Get thee hence, Wife Number One, to the public phone box which is conveniently located only 15 kilometres down the road. Dial the number on this reward leaflet that by the grace of Allah fell from the sky. Remember to ask for the man with the $US 5 million reward money!”

Then speaking to next woman in burqa.

“Wife Number Two, carry in our finest food and drink to our honoured guests.”

First woman in burqa, clutching reward handbill, exits stage left.

Second woman in burqa, carrying stew pot and jug, exits stage right.

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Final Act

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Impoverished Afghan Peasant speaking in broken Arabic as he enters barn.

“And is your excellency’s aged mutton curry to your liking? Would any of the noble gentlemen like fancy another jam jar of yak ghee? Perhaps you would like to sleep late in the morning. Do not worry, good sirs, I shall stand at the entrance and keep a close watch for the agents of the Great Satan. All will be well. You can trust me, for I am true follower of the great Mullah Omar. Er, that is the five million dollar Mullah himself currently over there in the corner using the goat, is it not? And is not the other noble Koranic scholar the Second in Command of El Qaeda, the honourable Egyptian, Wadi el Plug?”

Grunts of affirmation from the honoured guests and the goat.

Impoverished Afghan Peasant grins.

“Allah Akhbar indeed.”

Impoverished Afghan Peasant departs left to stand outside barn door rubbing his hands and prancing with mounting glee for five hours until the thwack, thwack, thwack of the approaching helicopters gradually becomes louder and the lights fade to the sound of Osama bin Liner screeching in Arabic over the sounds of machine gun fire.

“I told you we should not have trusted anyone who kept comparing our faces with the satanic images on the poster he had pinned on his mantelpiece!”

The depth of the disaster for the Islamists starts to become clear

Events in Afghanistan bring to mind a large container truck suddenly tipping over and spilling its load across a busy highway in front of traffic moving in both directions. As we see the situation shift not by the day but by the hour, it is important that people look not just at Mazar-i-Sharif, Kunduz, Kabul and Khandahar, but also at nuclear Pakistan: what happens in Islamabad, Karachi, Rawalpindi and Quetta will certainly end up being far more important in the long run.

For weeks since the US bombing started, the Islamic political parties in Pakistan have been whipping up sentiment with a world view that pits Islam against the godless foreigner. Large numbers of young Pakistanis heard the call for jihad against the United States and were urged to stand shoulder to shoulder with the Taliban and Al Qaeda in the defence of Islam. Thousands streamed across the Khyber Pass into Afghanistan seething with religious zeal to take up arms against the hated infidel.

The secular General Musharraf looked on uneasy as the streets swelled with crowds incited by his political enemies and has also been forced to keep looking over his shoulder at his own intelligence service, the ISI, who have always been the Taliban’s primary patron.

And then, the container truck unexpectedly tips over, scattering its cargo of… jack-in-the-boxes.

Weakened by the USAF/USN airstrikes far more than the ignorant and willfully pessimistic western pundits would have had us believe, the Taliban suddenly starts to collapse. Like dominos, town after town falls to the various anti-Taliban forces.

In Mazar-i-Sharif, we have learned that the Afghan Taliban forces took all the available motor vehicles and retreated as Abdul Rashid Dostam’s forces enveloped the city, leaving about 600 newly arrived pro-Taliban Pakistanis to face Dostam’s soldiers alone. The school in which they made their last stand is now a twisted ruin and at least 400 Pakistanis were wiped out in the bitter fighting.

In Kunduz, accounts suggest most of the Afghan Taliban forces have either defected or bailed out of the town prior to it being completely surrounded. What is left are largely Chechens, Chinese Muslims and Pakistani fighters. They are clearly doomed.

And so, it is interesting to note that the streets of Pakistan are surprisingly subdued. Far from ‘Islam’ rising up against the United States and its anti-Taliban friends in Afghanistan, city after city is filled with cheering throngs and America is saluted by the very people who lived through the bombing for contributing to the Taliban’s misfortunes. Hundreds and possibly thousands of young Pakistanis are already dead, killed not as Islamic holy warriors but as hated foreigners by Afghans who have had it up to ‘here’ with the interference of its neighbours.

So as the Islamic politicians of Pakistan survey how in the matter of eight days the entire situation in Afghanistan has turned upside down, the families and friends of the dead Pakistani boys who listened and then marched to their deaths across the Khyber pass are going to start asking ‘why?’ When people start to figure out the answer, I don’t think the forces of Islamo-fascism are going to like what happens next. It must be slowly dawning on the more secular forces in Pakistan that their Islamist political enemies are starting to look very exposed indeed.

For the west, nuclear armed Pakistan is far more important in the long run than that ‘Mad Max’ nation called Afghanistan.

Yes, the leitmotif for Afghanistan and Pakistan really is a jack-in-the-box. You heard it here first.

The excellent judgement of the Hashemite Kings of Jordan

It should be clear beyond any reasonable doubt that the judgement, discrimination and taste of the previous King of Jordan, Hussain, was remarkable… astonishing even. It should also be absolutely clear that the current King, Abdullah, was not just an inspired choice to succeed him but has in fact taken the talents of his predecessor to undreamt of heights of excellence.

Am I referring to their handling of Jordan’s relations with Israel? Was I thinking of how they have dealt with the dangerous and unpredictable Syrians? Did I mean the wide ranging internal reforms within Jordan? How they walk the tightrope of the ethnic dimension of Jordanian politics? No, none of those things.

I am of course referring to the Hashemite Kings outstanding taste in elegant, exquisite, intelligent women! Queen Noor was, and Queen Rania is, simply breathtaking. In these days of geopolitical turmoil, terrorism and economic confusion, let us pause for a moment and applaud a world leader for his taste in babes. As Mel Brooks said “It’s good to be the King!”

We do have some genuine friends in the Middle East… and is it such a bad thing that some of them are real lookers?