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The world is mad

Switzerland is a bastion of efficiency and rationality surrounded by the boiling maelstrom of stupidity that is Europe… and yet even they are falling foul of idiotic political correctness and absurd defensive ‘sensitivity’.

Swiss Santa Clauses have been banned from sitting children on their laps because of the risk that they might be accused of paedophilia […] Large groups of St Nicholases parade through the streets that day before visiting children. They traditionally sit them on their laps before asking if they have been well-behaved. “We want to counteract any possible accusations of paedophilia involving our members,” the Society of St Nicholas said in a statement. “We regret having to do this, but the public has become very sensitive about child abuse.”

Hardly the end of the world but it is not a good sign that even the dependibly sensible Swiss have this crap to deal with.

36 comments to The world is mad

  • It is not a good sign when the people hiding everyone else’s money start going in for this sort of thing, given how it inevitably leads to government regulation, sensitivity training, and vegetarianism. People should start withdrawing their money from Swiss banks forthwith, before the gnomes start having attacks of fiduciary conscience.

  • Once again America leads the world. Absurd hypersensitivity to claims of pedophilia here date back to the McMartin Preschool case, and the swarm of copycat witchhunts it spawned way back in the 1980s.

  • Verity

    akaky – That’s a chilling point. These guy are hiding money for billionaires all over the world and they’re busying themselves making regulations for Santa Claus? This is a worry.

  • Pete_London

    “We want to counteract any possible accusations of paedophilia involving our members,” the Society of St Nicholas said in a statement.

    A punch on the nose of any accuser would be a far more dignified way to do that.

  • Verity

    Pete_London – Agreed. A strong and fair Swiss punch sounds about right.

  • MarkE

    As usual action is taken against the apparent rather than the real; while a handfull of high profile abuse cases involve third parties, most abuse happens within families. If you want to protect children you should ban step fathers, uncles and other close relatives from sitting vulnerable children on their knees. Even some fathers are a risk. If you want an easy headline, then you should ban santas, teachers etc from touching children.

    I speak as a step father who has (shock horror!) sat his step children on his knoee, but never abused them.

  • Johnathan Pearce

    This is seriously alarming. The country that gave us Rolexes, great chocolate and yodelling goes in for this crap?

  • Pete

    I admit I don’t particularly like children’s entertainers taking my kids (sorry, I’ve been told on this forum to refer to them as “children”) on their laps.

    And what’s your point exactly? You appear to be saying that the public are wrong to be sensitive about child abuse – do you have any reason to do so other than a general “political correctness gone mad” sentiment?

    This strikes me as the kind of rational self-regulation that you should approve of. Would you prefer a European directive on the matter?

  • Pete: my point is that the notion that having a child sit on Santa’s lap is an invitation to paedophilia is just bonkers. Of course you are totally at liberty not to have your child do that if for some reason the culture has driven you to see paedophilia everywhere or even you just don’t like fat men with beards or whatever. A great deal of the sensitivity on this subject strikes me as over-sensitivity and I just do not believe the world is awash with pedarists regardless of what some would have us think.

    I don’t want regulation or self-regulation or anything else, just a bit of perspective. That professional Santas (a fairly hilarious concept, I must admit) feel it is inviting legal action to do this is the sign of a culture with some very unhealthy ‘issues’. I am having a cultural moan, not a legal or political one.

  • rosignol

    These guy are hiding money for billionaires all over the world and they’re busying themselves making regulations for Santa Claus? This is a worry.

    Not really- the people up to things more nefarious than tax evasion took their money to Monaco, Luxembourg, and the Bahamas ages ago.

  • Johnathan Pearce

    Perry is spot-on. I think there is a level of hysteria in our culture about this issue (and that is not the same as dismissing it). I mean, we are getting to the point where it will soon be illegal for someone like me to cuddle my little nieces.

  • Julian Taylor

    There is a slight difference between having children sit in your lap against having them perched on your knee, although I should think that the Hazel Blears type of national social[ist] worker would still call that child abuse – Blears now wants to ban scissors and pencil sharpeners from all UK schools after a recent case when a bullied girl was stabbed with a pair of scissors.

    Some time ago I did a Christmas advertisement for a UK supermarket chain featuring the usual jolly hohoho’ Santa and lots of young kids happily standing in line for Santa’s Grotto. The ‘education worker’ (she didn’t like using ‘social worker’ because of the negative implications that term has) actually used a black marker to draw across the thigh on the Santa actor’s tunic a line as to how far up his leg the children might sit.

  • Joshua

    Julian-

    WHAT???

    That’s off the scale. Not to mention – no better way to make kids curious about the naughty bits than having the local political officer put an invisible political force shield on the guy’s lap. SHEESH.

    Tell me you’re making this up (’cause I have a sinking feeling you’re not).

  • D Anghelone

    The country that gave us Rolexes, great chocolate and yodelling goes in for this crap?

    Yeah, but yodelling with a child in your lap…

    Maybe the Santas can be made to wear tinfoil bloomers to block any emanations from or to the children.

    I agree with Ken Hagler about that era in the US. To paraphrase Nixon, “We are all pedophiles now.”

  • Perry:

    the boiling maelstrom of stupidity that is Europe

    Right back to you:

    Yvette Cloete is a specialist in pediatric medicine at the Royal Gwent Hospital. But to an isolated group of vigilantes, she was obviously a child molester. Pediatric means pedophile, right? These self-appointed defenders of the truth made their position known by spray-painting the doctor’s windows and the front door of her home with the word “paedo,” an abbreviation of the British spelling “paedophile.”

    Gwent police inspector Karl Close investigated the attack, and came away with the clear impression that the perpetrators were plain stupid. “Are they just so dull they don’t realize the difference between the two?” Close asked the Associated Press. “This is a pediatrician who is committed to helping children and somebody targeted her.”

    This kind of hysteria has gone global a long time ago, but the hysterics aren’t usually this illiterate, or, well, stupid.

  • Verity

    I agree with Perry. The world is not awash with paedophiles and I think the people who obsess about this could perhaps be investigated. Why are they so interested? Isn’t this a worrying thing to be thinking about 24 hours a day.

    As for yodelling, I think it is child abuse. It could puncture their little eardrums.

    Hazel Blears is another completely abnormal woman – and ZaNu-Lab is full of them. Hazel, sweetie, try to restore discipline in schools to the level it was when you and your gang of gimcrack wreckers came slithering under the doors. It is you socialists who have created the climate in schools for happy-slapping and cutting up little girls’ faces with knives because you have taken all power away from teachers and school heads. You ugly moron.

  • Phil

    @Verity:: Here Here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • I agree with Ken Hagler about that era in the US. To paraphrase Nixon, “We are all pedophiles now.”

    Or, how about “Ich bein ein pedophile”?

  • D Anghelone

    Or, how about “Ich bein ein pedophile”?

    Joel Grey?

  • Julian Taylor

    Joshua, sadly not. There are now a plethora of permission and guardian forms that have to be completed before any kids are allowed near a set, regardless of a one hour photo shoot or the latest Narnia movie. As an example you can only film a child under 13 for a maximum 39 days in any one year – making filming of movies such as the Harry Potter series pretty dependent upon getting everything done within a set period of time – when you consider that the average movie schedules 10 weeks of filming you begin to see how hard it can become.

    To license kids for filming you have to get permission from THEIR local council (multiply that by 50 children on a set and you start to get the picture), who will then require proof that their education will not be affected, that they will not be abused in any way and their their evil parents are not simply exploiting the poor mites for money. In addition you will have to get a licensed chaperone to watch over a set number of children – the more kids there are the more chaperones you must have.

    You also get the occasional shoot where the local social services turn up unexpectedly and inspect the set before filming or turn up uninvited to a closed set to carry out an inspection – as happened on that commercial shoot. Sometimes they will turn up just in time for lunch and also bring other staff along, who then start wanting autographs, freebies etc., which you dare not refuse them in case your shoot gets shut down.

    Isn’t life just great under Tony Blair and his jolly funloving Labour Party?

  • Verity

    This is a serious question: Has Britain ever experienced the level of corruption that permeates all of government under Labour – from the prime minister’s wife to local council social services? God, I hate socialists.

  • Midwesterner

    “… simply exploiting the poor mites for money.”

    But can you think of a better description of the ‘education’ industry?

  • …surrounded by the boiling maelstrom of stupidity that is Europe

    ..has it ever occured to Perry that Britain is a part of Europe? Come on Brits, those days are over…

    Next point: ever heard of a Swiss running amok? Check the archives, all that “Ordnung” has it’s dark side…

  • Old Jack Tar

    has it ever occured to Perry that Britain is a part of Europe?

    Opinions vary, mate.

  • Johnathan Pearce

    Verity, you ask an interesting question about the level of corruption in Britain today. So interesting, in fact, that I am going to blog about it a bit later.

  • Verity

    has it ever occured to Perry that Britain is a part of Europe?

    No it’s not.

  • Verity

    I’ll look out for it, Jonathan!

  • Pete

    If the organisation in question had been the Roman Catholic Church rather than the Santas Trade Union, I wonder if you would be quite so dismissive?

    I disagree with the ban myself – I just avoid putting my kids in these situations, which seems like a far more rational response. I was just pointing out that I don’t like them sitting on strangers’ laps. If you want to dismiss me as a loony paranoid basket case then fine. Is that because child abuse simply doesn’t exist, or it does but it’s nothing to really worry about? I’m keen to know.

  • I just avoid putting my kids in these situations, which seems like a far more rational response. I was just pointing out that I don’t like them sitting on strangers’ laps. If you want to dismiss me as a loony paranoid basket case then fine.

    You may or may not be a loony paranoid basket case but I certainly support your right to not have your children sit on Santas lap.

    My basic point is that I find it curious that you think a child sitting on Santa’s lap is putting them in a ‘situation’ at all.

    Is that because child abuse simply doesn’t exist, or it does but it’s nothing to really worry about? I’m keen to know.

    Of course it exists, just like murder and rape exist. However I find it implausible that child abuse is as prevalent as some claim and therefore justify ending whole cultural traditions because of the risks they pose. I mean maybe I just got lucky growing up but that is how it seems to me. Moreover I find it even more implausible that sitting on Santa’s knee presents a rich opportunity for child abuse. Presumably it is not the custom in Switzerland for Santa to take little Hans or Heidi into a darkened locked room and only then ask if they have been naughty or nice.

  • Julian Taylor

    Seems like the Swiss are now catching up on what we experienced in the 1980’s in the UK, namely the witchhunts carried out by a newly empowered social services for children exhibiting even the slightest symptoms of abuse – I’m sure many here recall the horrendous Dr Marietta Higgs and the Cleveland abuse scandal,

    Perhaps the most lasting effect has been the climate of fear which was created and engendered in the parents of young children by events in Cleveland in 1987, not only in Cleveland but the rest of the U.K. In the 1980s male parents were becoming more accepting of their role as direct carers of their children and to share roles with their female partners, commonly referred to as the `Sensitive New Age Guys’ [SNAGs]. This involved the male parent in bathing and dressing their children and performing other acts of personal care. Following Cleveland, many male parents withdrew from these activities from fear that their actions might be seen as unhealthy by social workers and might be misinterpreted by social workers as having an unnatural interest in their children, and they feared allegations of child abuse could be made against them..

    Bear in mind that these same social workers (pardon the oxymoron) are probably now in powerful positions within this country’s state health and welfare dapartments

  • Verity

    Julian – Any way of finding out their names? One or two of them may even be in Tony Blair’s cabinet. After all, it’s got Ruth Kelly, Hazel Blears, Jack Straw, sometimes David Blunkett and other knockabouts. Patricia Hewitt … Where did these ghouls come from?

  • D Anghelone

    Maybe the kiddies can drop a dime on Santa:

    “”If you deny a 14-year-old girl her mobile phone and MSN (Internet chat) access, it is just like child abuse,” Elisabeth Staksrud told financial daily Dagens Næringsliv.”

    Aftenposten

  • Joshua

    This Elisabeth Staksrud person is the “European Commission’s expert on attitudes to electronic media,” so I’m sure she knows what she’s talking about…

  • Verity

    I’m sure she found her post in The Guardian Pretend Jobs section.

  • D Anghelone

    This Elisabeth Staksrud person is the “European Commission’s expert on attitudes to electronic media,” so I’m sure she knows what she’s talking about…

    It’s like the Monty Python version of 1984.

    And shouldn’t Dale Amon have that job?

  • Verity

    It didn’t occur to Dale to pick up The Guardian on the day it was advertised.