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Guns and Dope Party

Over at Hit & Run, Jesse Walker notes that Robert Anton Wilson is a candidate in the California election, and reprints one of his position papers:


Little Tony was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th candy bar, a man on the bench across from him said, “Son, you know eating all that candy isn’t good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat.”

Little Tony replied, “My grandfather lived to be 107 years old.”

The man asked, “Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?”

Little Tony answered, “No, he minded his own fucking business.”

7 comments to Guns and Dope Party

  • Rob Read

    Now that IS classic!

  • “Like what you like, enjoy what you enjoy, and don’t take crap from anybody.”


    It’s almost enough to drive a guy to voting.

  • Dale Amon

    I had the good fortune to be present when R.A.W and Karl Hess did a stream of conciousness discussion utilizing whatever words or ideas were thrown out by the audience. They both sat at a small round table on a low stage… smoked one and then started. It was… different.

  • George Peery

    Oh wonderful!

    One reason young people today are so screwed up is because so-called adults don’t have the intestinal fortitude to call them out and shape them up.

    The “man on the bench” should have placed “Little Tony” across his knees and tanned the arse of the little brat.

  • A Crawford

    George… this is California we’re talking about! Children under 16 know they can shoot adults and get off with two years max! Better if the adult just pepper sprayed the little rascal before he was able to pull his gun.

  • R C Dean

    Oh, I dunno, George. It seems to me that total strangers should keep their noses out of other people’s business, and should certainly not assault said other people for expressing their opinions.

  • Ed Piman


    Do you believe you are entitled to beat any child you see fit to beat? I don’t think you really mean that, but it seems to follow from what you wrote. If so, does your right to beat people extend to adults, or do you limit yourself to children? Maybe adults are too likely to fight back?

    I know it would go very, very hard on any man who struck one of my children.