We are developing the social individualist meta-context for the future. From the very serious to the extremely frivolous... lets see what is on the mind of the Samizdata people.

Samizdata, derived from Samizdat /n. - a system of clandestine publication of banned literature in the USSR [Russ.,= self-publishing house]

Bulldog breed

Here are extracts from a letter by Geoff Bean, an English dairy farmer, addressed to Steve Williamson, a “Special Enforcement Officer” of the agency in York. The York farmer bought builder’s rubble to make repairs round his farm, but received a letter stating that since his land did not have the benefit of a Waste Management Licence, this depositing of “waste” was in clear breach of the law and requesting that Mr Bean submit to a formal interview under the Police and Criminal Evidence Act (PACE) to “establish” his involvement in this unlicensed waste management operation.

I am in receipt of your pompous and ill-informed letter. How dare you write to me in such terms, as if you were addressing a common criminal.

The “waste” for which he had paid good money was about to be put to valuable use replacing the floor of a barn and resurfacing his farm tracks.

Were I a one-legged homosexual Afghan refugee/terrorist living on the welfare state, you and your ilk would not dare write in such a manner for fear of having all the human rights lawyers in creation round your necks, but as you are speaking to an honest, hard-working and overstressed Englishman, you appear to think you can behave like all too many of the vast and ever-increasing army of totally useless, non-productive, arrogant and bloody-minded officialdom, who are now only too successfully doing more damage to this once great and free nation than was ever achieved by Adolf Hitler.

Mr Williamson repeated that Mr Bean must submit to interview “under caution”. Mr Bean agreed to spare some of his valuable time to assist Mr Williamson in his “futile attempt” to justify his “bureaucratic red tape”, but reminded him that, since slavery in this country had been abolished, he would expect reimbursement at “£150 an hour or part thereof, plus VAT”.

That’s the spirit!

But rejoice ye not, since whether Mr Bean will face criminal charges for his breach of EU law, the agency cannot yet comment…

From Sunday Telegraph’s Christopher Booker’s Notebook

Update: If you think this is outrageous, you might want to share your thoughts with Mr Steve Williamson himself. And while you are at it, why not to cc his boss, the regional director Mr Andrew Wood. We have done a bit of research and think these email addresses will work, given the format of the Environmental Agency emails.

14 comments to Bulldog breed

  • Matthew

    Where can we get the e-mail address of billy the bungling bureaucrat? Swamp the toad

  • George Peery

    Farmer Bean should start a blog.

  • Matthew… your wish is our command! See the update on the article

  • Kit Taylor

    Great to see a patriot giving The Man a taste of English spunk!

  • Liberty Belle

    Thanks, Gabriel Syme. Duly noted and executed.

  • Kit: whilst I understand and share your sentiments…’spunk’ has a rather different meaning on this side of the Atlantic!!!

  • bear, the (one each)

    Be careful: your masters (or soon-to-be masters) in Brussels will not like this sort of thing, pestering an all mighty and all knowing bureaucrat.

    It is so sad to see Britain, a country I have always admired, become France. Many of my WWII heroes are British (or is the right term English, I am never sure how that distinction works). Douglas Bader, Benjamin Bryant, “Catseyes” Cunningham (and his “AI” operator Cecil Fredrick Rawnsley), Guy Gibson, Barnes Wallis, Sir Alfred Watson Watt and countless others. Were these folks alive today (or if they are still, young enough to do anything) I have no doubt things would be far better and different there.

    Unfortunately, the US is not that far behind you, with its anti-business climate, preferred classes of people, income tax “refunds” to folks who pay no income tax, and all the rest of it.

  • Tony

    I’m wetting myself at the moment, giggling and desperately trying to rid my mind of the mental image of that officious wanker getting ….. well, I totallly agree with Perry! 🙂

  • The man in the picture is Not Geoff Bean, I take it?

    Do you have contact details for the man in the picture with the “Acres, tons, gallons only” sign? I’d like to talk to him.

  • mike sullivan

    Dear Sir,

    To my way of thinking, Mr. Bean would only be operating an “unlicensed waste management operation” if he were disposing of waste material. Since he seems to be putting a construction by-product to productive use, in construction repair, I fail to see how how even an idiot could accuse him of operating an unlicensed waste management operation. If you are to continue to harass Mr. Bean, to be fair, you will need to follow-up by investigating other industries that use industrial by-products, such as natural gas or leather.


    Michael Sullivan

  • Mark, as far as we know, the man in the picture is Mr Geoff Bean himself. This picture was next to the article about him and we assume it is him.

    We had to scan it from the newspaper edition, as the online version did not have a picture.

  • Good gracious, thanks, Gabriel.

    So I’ll try those “Mr Bean should have a blog”/”…oh now he does have a blog” links. Ta.

  • Sorry, I can’t find the “update to the blog” with contact details to Geoff Bean.

    My apologies if I’m stupidly overlooking something. It’s been a long day.

  • Mark, I am afraid Mr Geoff Bean does not have a blog, he is a farmer in Yorkshire, too busy avoiding EU and UK redtape to do anything else. Your confusion, I think, arose thus:

    Comment by Matthew: Where can we get the e-mail address of billy the bungling bureaucrat? Swamp the toad

    Reply comment by Perry: Matthew… your wish is our command! See the update on the article

    In between you had a comment calling for a blog for Mr Bean.

    The update was me searching for email address of Mr Steve Williamson, so the “bungling bureaucrat can be swamped”.

    So, here you have it. It indeed has been a long day. 🙂

    I did another search for Mr Bean and found only snipets of information about him in the local papers. This is not the first time he has been ‘approached’ by the Environmental Agency and many other unsavoury branches of the British state. I am sure it would be possible to track him down, if needed. (The local paper that mentioned him is called This is Ryedale.)