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The Duff-Voggenhuber Plan

The drive to revive the European Union’s Constitution, after the period of reflection, is proving rather fruitless. Since full ratification will not be forthcoming, the only outcome currently in prospect is a fudged showdown. A combination of vindaloo and Armitage Shanks. Either the Nos will be finessed with opt-outs so that the structural changes will be implemented without too much distress, or the EU will fracture with a move by an avant-garde towards a more deeply integrated European state, a la Chirac.

To avoid their nightmare of fractured EU, the Euro-MPs, Andrew Duff and Johannes Voggenhuber are preparing to fill the breach, parliamentarians riding to the rescue of the forlorn constitution. The two pour scorn on the European Council, as a tool divided and unable to provide leadership. Please note that whilst their quotes may verge on satire, they are authentic and provide a sad testament to the delusional meta-context of Brussels.

“From Europe’s leaders we have had a display of a wide range of simplistic solutions to the crisis,” Duff said on Friday.

“From President Chirac we have had a proposal for a piecemeal approach to the constitution and from Nicolas Sarkozy we have had a proposal for a restructured version.”

From [the Dutch and UK foreign ministers] Bernard Bot and Jack Straw we have confirmation that the present treaty is finished; from Austrian Chancellor Wolfgang Schuessel we have him disagreeing with all of these people and then we have the president of Finland disagreeing with Schuessel.”

“All their proposals are constitutionally improper or politically quite unrealistic. Some of them are both.”

This institutional paralysis amongst the Member States provides an opportunity. The European Parliament can provide leadership and attain its place in the sun:

Both MEPs want parliament to show a clear way forward on reviving the constitution debate in Strasbourg next Wednesday and Thursday.

“We have to decide as a parliament if we are to fill the political space or to be satisfied with being supine parrots of fashion; commentators of the paralysed and confused European council,” said Duff.

Voggenhuber argued that there didn’t appear to be any serious EU leadership on the constitution.

“The crisis seems to be getting worse,” he said adding, “The question now is who is going to be able to lead us out of this crisis.”

“Someone has to take responsibility, someone has to take initiatives. If it’s not the parliament, then who is going to take the lead and stand up for the constitutional process?”

It is kind of Duff and Voggenhuber to selflessly burden themselves with this responsibility. But why not leave it to the French and Dutch people? They stood up to the constitutional process, didn’t they?

15 comments to The Duff-Voggenhuber Plan

  • Entirely off topic, for which apologies, but this will interest Samizdata readers:

    [UKIP] has appointed David Campbell-Bannerman, great nephew of the former Liberal Prime Minister Sir Henry Campbell-Bannerman, as its new chairman with a remit of conducting a radical libertarian policy review.

    Which sounds interesting.

  • Johnathan Pearce

    “A combination of vindaloo and Armitage Shanks”. Now there’s a thought to conjure with on a crisp Sunday lunchtime.

  • There is no political space to be filled, the constitution was defeated and that is that… except clearly like some undead monster from a bad slasher movies, it just will not lay down and die!

  • Verity

    What Perry wrote was going to be my comment, too. It’s vampirish. We need someone with a strong stomach, a silver bullet and a string of garlic to shoot it. Then drive a stake through its heart. This monster must be forced to stay dead to matter the strength of the attempts to revivify it.

  • Phil

    Duff is an imbecile,unfortunatly we here in Suffolk have to put up with his inane rantings, almost once a month in the EADT.

  • RAB

    I dont want it to have a place in the sun,
    I want it to have a place in hell!

  • K

    A view from America.

    The problem with getting the EU constitution past voters (as opposed to politicans) was that the proposed text seemed designed to entrench an already huge bureauocracy. It ensured little except more power, wonderful benefits, and little accountability.

    Nations that adopt a new constitution normally are ennumerating the powers and limits of the elected officals. In the EU the vote was/is for bureaucrats who essentially cannot be removed.

  • chuck

    On those days when I think of Europe as a shitty little continent I am inclined to wish the proposed Constitution and the Charter of Human Tights upon its inhabitants: it is only what they deserve. When I am feeling more generous, I wish the Constitution to die. Strangely, I find it hard to settle on one view or the other.

  • What worries me most about the way the constitution was rejected was that it was on the grounds of being too free-market. I guess that means the next attempt will be more socialistic.

    Verity,

    “a silver bullet and a string of garlic to shoot it

    Is it a vampire or a werewolf? We need to know.

    Chuck,

    Did you mean to write “Charter of Human Tights”. We’ve already got Verity’s hybrid monster to contend with. Now we must also face a Silence of the Lambs style human-skin-suit. This is getting very creepy…

  • BH: Yeah I reported in the comments on that about a month ago. It will be interesting to see if he can get the party to change with him. If he manages to change the party things could get interesting for the Tories.

    Mark: Silver Bullets works against vamps as well; especially if you bless em/fill em’ with holy water.

  • Simon Jester

    … and turn them into dum-dums by cutting a cross shape into the tip.

  • Verity

    The way you kill a vampire who has left his coffin at midnight and flown through an open castle window to suck the blood of a young woman clad in a flimsy nightie – and who appears to be all alone in the castle as no one ever seems to hear them scream – is, you get a string of garlic; you load your pistol with a silver bullet and shoot; then when he is dead, you drive a stake through his heart. Then you drag him back into his coffin and set it on fire. (I added that last bit myself; I’m surprised that no one ever thought of it before.)

    This is the tried and true, traditional formula for ridding your castle of vampires as any fule no. Christopher Lee will confirm.

  • RAB

    Yes for heaven’s sake Mark ” Be prepared”
    We invented the boyscouts after all.
    Carry a well stocked toolkit for all eventualities, be they werewolves or vampires.
    Ah but how do you counter the current CHEESE of centerist Cameronblair Citizen?
    Dave’s latest idea is that French local govt is the bee’s knees. Tone agrees (Hey! might even retire there).
    Meanwhile my fellow citizens are being detained for handing out pamphlets !

  • Verity

    RAB – Emily is not going to be retiring to France because he is going on to his next job as King of The World. Kofi Anan is retiring soon or is scheduled to be dropped off the roof of the UN building and Emily’s name is being put forward. This would suit him to a T. The biggest tranzi organisation in the world! He can boss 300 countries around. Britain was never big enough for Emily! He needs bigger horizons. Less democracy. More people to boss and mould. Mrs Emily – Her Cherieness – can walk through Customs rolling a luggage caravan sagging with with free gifts and no one will say, “Excuse me, Madame …”! UN Peacekeepers to swagger around visiting! Maybe once he’s free of the picky British public he might become a little more daring in his troop-visiting outfits. A touch of Lawrence of Arabia for the ME, for example. Nothing too showy, of course.

    Anyway, RAB, I am trusting you to take notes on CBB tonight as they are going to serve Michael Barrymore with papers for a private prosecution for wrongful death. I don’t think there’s any way I can access it on the internet. Maybe they’ll put highlights on their site, though.

  • I had no idea that I was so ignorant about the underworld..

    or that this was such a bad place to show weakness on the subject.