Thursday
We bit off more than we could chew. They were just Cockney barrow boy spivs. Total thugs. I’ve never seen anyone less amenable to listening to our point of view.
- An unnamed member of a group of Greenpeace activists, who failed to stop trading on the International Petroleum Exchange yesterday, but who did succeed in having the crap beaten out of them by traders.
(Link via Tim Blair)

Now that is a story to bring tears of joy and laughter. 'Sod off swampy' - LOL! If only the same could be meted out to the hunt saboteurs, G8 rentamob, 'wall of human spam' and thoughtless do gooding low lifes that populate Greenpeace, etc. Anyone ever read Millie Tant in Viz? I have an image of her converging with Postman Plod.
Posted by Patrick W at February 17, 2005 02:30 PM
Patrick W - Agreed. I was helpless with laughter. "Sod off, Swampy" was hysterical and I'm betting it's already entered the language.
Posted by Verity at February 17, 2005 02:47 PM
Come on then Michael - Verity and I have determined that the quote of the day is in fact 'Sod Off Swampy!' and not 'We bit off...'
Posted by Patrick W at February 17, 2005 03:18 PM
It hurts to give credit to the French. The French sinking the Greenpeace ship may have been the only French Naval victory in the last 2 centuries, but it was a Major one. Sod off Swampy would also make a good Nom de' Net. I tried to get Sea of Red, but somebody beat me too it. Maybe I'll have better luck this time. I do know a guy that has the kit to make bumper stickers, Will 'Sod off Swampy' be the next 'shit happens'?
Posted by Stehpinkeln at February 17, 2005 03:28 PM
Commodity trades always get to have all the fun.
Posted by Shannon Love at February 17, 2005 03:34 PM
What an unthinking moron that "unnamed member" of Greenpeace is. Why the hell does he think anyone should listen to his point of view when he deliberately and illegally forced his way onto someone else's property to disrupt a completely legal proceeding? Would he listen to the point of view of a rapist who broke into said Greenpeace activist's home to violate Greenpeace activist, his wife or his children? All power to the traders who cracked some skulls to ensure the primitive tactics of these Greenpeace barbarians were rendered ineffective. Incidentally, I must admit, the "sod off, Swampy" bit was what did it for me, too!
Posted by I'm suffering for my art at February 17, 2005 03:48 PM
Lovely Jubly.
I've just submitted a comment over on the Beeb in response to the writings of one anti-free trade "William", who thinks controlling free trade is "a job for the Government" What are we teaching these kids? We get it from the kids, we get it from the Swampys. What a double fuck. "Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right"
Of course, whether my comments will be printed or not is another story. I did manage to work in a Scotty quote though :)
Posted by James at February 17, 2005 04:10 PM
This made my freakin' day.
Is there a way I can send a note of appreciation to these fine roughneck traders? Hell, I'd buy them all a pint if I could.
I'm in Chicago, and know guys who work at the Chicago Board of Trade - they are all guys "from the neighborhood," as we say, and I would love to see their reaction if the local trustafarians broke into their workspace. I imagine many teeth would be lost, at the very least.
Posted by Percy Dovetonsils at February 17, 2005 04:20 PM
Can someone explain what "Sod off Swampy" means? I understand the "sod off" portion, but not the use of the term "swampy."
Thanks
Posted by Gary Gunnels at February 17, 2005 05:31 PM
(In)famous anti-road idiot who became mildly famous for living up a tree for a long while.
I love it...go barrow boys. Nice to see the left getting roughed-up like what normally happens to Protest Warrior when they show up to rallies.
Posted by Andrew Ian Dodge at February 17, 2005 05:59 PM
AID,
I see. Sort of like the young lady who lived in a tree here in the U.S.: http://www.ottermedia.com/LunaJulia.html
Posted by Gary Gunnels at February 17, 2005 06:09 PM
What joy!
"I took on a Texan Swat team at Esso last year and they were angels compared with this lot."
“They grabbed us and started kicking and punching. Then when we were on the floor they tried to push huge filing cabinets on top of us to crush us.”
This has truly made my day. Mr Plod, us cockney barrow boys can sort out our own problems. Go and have a pint with that fella abusing Swampy.
Gary
This is Swampy - Environmental Warrior(!)
Posted by Pete_London at February 17, 2005 06:11 PM
No, Swampy lived in a tunnel system underground, I think, whilst the Newbury Bypass was being built.
Posted by JamesB at February 17, 2005 06:14 PM
JamesB,
That activity would seem to jive better with his "name."
Posted by Gary Gunnels at February 17, 2005 06:16 PM
Article on this "Swampy" fellow:
http://archive.salon.com/june97/media/media970605.html
His real name is Daniel Hooper.
Posted by Gary Gunnels at February 17, 2005 06:26 PM
I gleefully join this chorus of approval.
A squadron of spoilt, neurotic, trustafarians getting a damn good kicking from a bunch of hard-working, ambitious, wealth-producers brings a ray of sunshine to my heart.
Should have happened long ago.
May it happen again (frequently).
Posted by David Carr at February 17, 2005 10:32 PM
There it is, ladies and gentlemen, the answer to the vexing problem of self-defense in the United Kingdom! The next time a burglar breaks into your home you can beat the malefactor to within an inch of his (or her; let's not be sexist) life with a cricket bat and tell the police that you thought you were being attacked by a squad of environmentalists! Ye gods, it is simplicity itself; why didnt anyone think of it before this?!
Posted by akaky at February 17, 2005 10:36 PM
All together now:
“Just a perfect day,
Trade oil on the Petroleum Exchange floor,
And then later, when the time is four,
We go home.
Just a perfect day,
Make some protesters cry boo hoo,
Then later, abuse them, too,
And then home.
Oh it's such a perfect day,
I'm glad I spent it at work.
Oh such a perfect day,
You just keep me hanging on,
You just keep me hanging on.
Just a perfect day,
Protesters not left alone,
Traders hold their own.
It's such fun.
Just a perfect day,
You made me forget myself.
I thought I was someone else,
Someone good.
Just a perfect day,
Told swampy to sod off,
Then nutted some arsehole toff,
It's such fun.
Just a perfect day,
You made me forget myself.
I thought I was someone else,
Someone good.
Oh it's such a perfect day,
I'm glad I spent it at work.
Oh such a perfect day,
You just keep me hanging on,
You just keep me hanging on.
Greenpeace
You're going to reap just what you sow,
You're going to reap just what you sow,
You're going to reap just what you sow,
You're going to reap just what you sow..
Posted by Giles at February 17, 2005 11:24 PM
..and once more with Heather Small-like passion,
"Y'all gonna reap, just what ya sow, yeah"
Posted by James at February 17, 2005 11:28 PM
<quote>
Last night Greenpeace said two protesters were in hospital, one with a suspected broken jaw, the other with concussion.
</quote>
Is there somewhere we can send them "Get Well Slowly" cards?
Posted by Slowjoe at February 17, 2005 11:51 PM
Definitely story of the week. Does anyone remember the time a year or two back when traders somewhere else were pelting anticapitalists with champagne corks? Can't remember enough details to track down the story now...
Posted by Another Giles at February 18, 2005 01:13 AM
Did anybody hear where Swampy is now?
I was told that he had been imprisoned in Dublin for stabbing somebody in a nightclub who refused to give him a cigarette, but I haven't been able to track down any media coverage, so I expect that this is untrue.
Posted by Peter Nolan at February 18, 2005 01:25 AM
I remember hearing he'd come to Ireland for a protest over a road or forest or something like that. Wouldn't surprise me if he got himself banged up for some stupid reason.
Posted by James at February 18, 2005 06:25 AM
"It hurts to give credit to the French. The French sinking the Greenpeace ship may have been the only French Naval victory in the last 2 centuries, but it was a Major one."
One which required a terrorist attack on a peaceful soveriegn nation.
Posted by Shawn at February 18, 2005 06:56 AM
Ah...oh this is so hard warming, these piles of filth usually get their way practically everywhere else. They show up and harass and demean people who actually are worth something, and all the police ever do is cordon them off so no one can ever respond to them with the tactics that Greenpeace, PETA, ELF, etc use. They deserve everything they get and more (preferably more), scream "proto-fascist" all they want, I find it increasingly difficult to think of ANYTHING that could be done to these maggots that would bother me. I mean this story might be light hearted in its own way, but its really infuriating deep down, after all by trying to shut down oil exchange they implicitly desire to wreck the economy and thus society. These are totalitarian sympathizers who should be treated as a Soviet spy would have been treated, their ends are the same. Sorry for the fire and brimstone...its just I find it hard to be humorous about nihilistic envirosocialists, these people would like to end civilization as we know and apparently pissed off traders are the only ones that want to do anything against them. Then again most of the politicians of continental Europe seem to be in bed with these types.
Posted by Matt W. at February 18, 2005 07:41 AM
" by trying to shut down oil exchange they implicitly desire to wreck the economy and thus society"
Wow! Crikey! I never relised that the oil exchange was so central to society.
I reckon that if ANY organisational group gets wiped out by some calamity, it won't be long before they are replaced.
Posted by zmollusc at February 18, 2005 09:05 AM
“They grabbed us and started kicking and punching. Then when we were on the floor they tried to push huge filing cabinets on top of us to crush us.”
Could not stop laughing!
Posted by Jon at February 18, 2005 10:10 AM
I used to work in that building and clearly the activists' planning didn't extend to taking a quick look at the traders they were about to confront. Of all the places they in the city I can't think of anywhere they could have been more certain of finding a robust response. Personally, I wouldn't have advised heading in there in anything less than an APC.
The surviving Greenpieces seemed rather shocked that at the violent reaction to their, um, peaceful breaking and entering. Perhaps they should have checked the government's timely advice on dealing with intruders:
Anyone can use reasonable force to protect themselves or others, or to carry out an arrest or to prevent crime. You are not expected to make fine judgements over the level of force you use in the heat of the moment..........
Seems to cover it quite nicely.
Posted by John O'Dea at February 18, 2005 10:24 AM
'"They were just Cockney barrow boy spivs. Total thugs,” one protester said, rubbing his bruised skull.'
A bit of class disdain here from the Greenies?
Hmmmm.
Robert Hale
Posted by Robert Hale at February 18, 2005 10:49 AM
May I echo Percy in wishing that I could buy each of these guys a pint in gratitude. I do enjoy stories with a happy ending.
Posted by Doug Allen at February 19, 2005 05:08 PM
I couldn't stop laughing, either. I put it up on my blog under "humor". "just total thugs" --uh, let's see, this is a forcible trespasser (in the US, this is called "breaking and entering", and can get one shot with impugnity) calling the kettle black.
Anybody got a link to some photos? I'd love to add it to the blog. A thug in a hand-tailored suit kicking a saint in greasy dreadlocks would warm me heart.
Posted by Sam_S(ShenzhenRen) at February 20, 2005 04:22 AM
Could there be a more satisfying sound than the squealing indignation of someone getting the taste of their own medicine?
Posted by Steve P at February 20, 2005 11:12 AM
Has anyone else read the related articles on the Times web site? It's shocking how different the event looks if you only read the following articles.
The articles are "Greenpeace storms London oil market" and "10 Kyoto protesters arrested after oil protest".
The real kicker is that the articles differ on the number of protesters involved and barely mentioned the reaction of the traders. These two articles make it sound like Greenpeace's protest was a major event that was successful in stopping oil trading.
It looks like all the reporters did was talk to some Greenpeace officers and protesters. Does -any- journalism schools teach critical thinking?
Posted by Joe P at February 24, 2005 11:26 PM









