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Where archaeology meets politics - on the banks of the Potomac, of course:

Archeologists digging near the Potomac River report they have found a partial human skeleton from the Magnusregimentumian era, also called 'the era of big government.'

Scientists have dubbed the creature Homo Republicus.

"The cranium is rather large, but the spinal column doesn't seem strong enough to support it," said an unnamed archeologist working at the dig site. "Despite its impressive thinking capabilities, it apparently crawled along on its belly, often carrying opportunistic vermin on its back."

Scott Ott of Scrappleface generally hits the mark with his satire, and in the fine tradition of going after the big slow targets first, his mark is often governmental fecklessness and political cowardice.