Sunday
(0)I note with disappointment (but not surprise) that the 'global warming' hoax is still proving useful to cash-strapped governments everywhere:
New Zealand's farmers have criticised a proposed tax on the flatulence emitted by their sheep and cattle.The move is part of the Wellington government's action to meet its commitments under the Kyoto Protocol on global warming.
Scientists estimate that methane emitted by farm animals is responsible for more than half of the country's greenhouse gases.
To be known as the Federal Advanced Rural Tariff, it surely has to rank as among the most secure of long-term revenue raisers. Contrast this to the UK where draconian petroleum taxes are justified by HMG's creepy 'behaviour modification' rubric. The argument goes that taxing people out of their cars and onto public transport is a good thing because it 'saves the planet' (stop laughing). Of course, if we ever did stop using our cars so much, the paladins in Whitehall would have a collective coniption fit.
However, short of turning them all into cheeseburgers, there is no way to persuade cattle to stop passing wind, so a different bonus has to be invented:
The money is be used to fund research on agricultural emissions.
Read: "Job creation scheme for the political classes". Further proof that the Kyoto Protocol really was a lot of hot air.
Still, there is a political upside to this. Next time some veggie enviro-mentalist hisses at you for tucking into a steak, you can always respond by telling them that you're helping to reduce global warming.
And the next logical step: a tax on breathing since that produces CO2, for animals and men alike (no discrimination).
Posted by Jacob at June 22, 2003 02:19 PM
Insanity!
If cows really produce that much methane, maybe we should explore using them as an alternative fuel source.
Posted by Watcher at June 22, 2003 04:10 PM
How are they going to measure it? Men from the ministry sneaking through the herds with flatulence meters? What if they miss some? Do they still get the tax, or is it gone with the wind?
Posted by Liberty Belle at June 22, 2003 04:25 PM
Maybe they will create a new department: The Department of Flatulence Control
Posted by HC at June 22, 2003 05:01 PM
This is the whole reason the U.S. (not just Bush, but 95 out of 100 Senators rejected it as well under Clinton) rejected it. It was a large plan for wasteful bureaucracy cloaked as a plan to "save the world."
Posted by Catherine at June 22, 2003 06:03 PM
A tax on farts. A fart tax. Liberals always find a way to intrude on life's pleasures. What "flaming bags of hippie crap gas." Bwahaahhahahahahahah
Posted by D2D at June 22, 2003 07:49 PM
"Next time some veggie enviro-mentalist hisses at you for tucking into a steak, you can always respond by telling them that you're helping to reduce global warming."
If some veggie asshole had the temerity to hiss at my choice of meat, I'd respond by kicking him in the balls.
If it were a woman, I'd just ask whether she does this nonsense because she can't get a man.
Morons.
And the Kiwis, usually so level-headed, seem to have had some kind of collective (non-methane) brain fart.
Posted by Kim du Toit at June 23, 2003 05:51 AM
Next time some veggie enviro-mentalist hisses at you for tucking into a steak, you can always respond by telling them that you're helping to reduce global warming.
LOL - I vote this quote of the day!
Posted by Alan at June 23, 2003 10:52 AM
Heh. They could call it the Department of Farts. Nah, that would cover just about everyone working for the U.S. government. I would get a government subsidy to give my cows Beano that should solve the problem. Those leftists in N.Z. are some dumbasses, but the Kiwis keep voting for them.
Posted by D2D at June 23, 2003 11:20 AM
Ironic that a fundamental argument against their draconian envirofascist policies... eg. that 98% of 'greenhouse gasses' are produced by nature... is now being used to justify implementing a 'control'. Which is really their intention isn't it?
Posted by DANEgerus at June 24, 2003 12:12 AM
