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Samizdata, derived from Samizdat /n. - a system of clandestine publication of banned literature in the USSR [Russ.,= self-publishing house]

Ahh the truth at last!!

So you thought that the impending war in the Middle East was about oil? Hah!! Or did you think it was all about zionist aggression? You dolt.

Thanks to Ron Liebermann, Illuminatus and Whistle-blower par excellence, the truth behind America’s plans in the Middle East have been revealed to us: it’s all about Euros:

“Simply put, the dollar has for several decades been positioned as the only way for an industrialized country to pay OPEC for oil. No matter who you were, you had to buy American dollars and then send those dollars to OPEC, who would then use the money to buy American debt, or American weapons.

It was the perfect set-up. Greenspan printed worthless dollars, and gave them to people who gave us free gasoline, and free TV sets, and free wicker furniture.”

No war for wicker furniture, that’s what I say.

“The game changed, however, when the Euro was introduced. Now, many oil-producing nations are accepting the Euro instead of the dollar. Saddam loves the Euro.”

Why only the other day he declared it to be the ‘Mother of all Currencies’.

“This new competition from the Euro makes Uncle Sam very angry. So Uncle Sam came up with a plan; he sent a secret message to all the Arabs: You will only accept American Dollars, or we will kill you.”

And to which the Arabs replied,’Sorry we can only take Mastercard, or we will bill you’. Besides if that message was ‘secret’ how does Mr.Liebermann know about it?

“In spite of the threats, the Euro is continuing to gain in popularity. So what? You might ask. If oil sellers take one kind of worthless note instead of another, that’s no skin off our backs. But the American government can’t print Euros. It can only print dollars.”

Mr.Liebermann, anyone with a packet of wax crayons and a photocopier can print Euros.

Oh but just hark at me quibbling with an analytical giant. Just read through to the end of the article but, a warning to you Americans; Mr.Liebermann has got some seriously bad news:

“No more Petro-Dollar reserve currency; no more free stuff for Americans.”

Don’t say you weren’t warned.

[My thanks to Richard Poe for the link]

13 comments to Ahh the truth at last!!

  • set

    I call it kindergarten economics.

  • Anonymous

    I am not involved in any Masonic conspiracies, but Saddam Hussein still wants to eat my cat!

  • tk73

    Notice, at the end of the article, that the man is a manufacturer of balloons. He must have been sampling too much helium.

  • tk73

    Notice, at the end of the article, that the man is a manufacturer of balloons. He must have been sampling too much helium.

  • I found a much longer article suggesting this theory. I think this guy was plagiarizing the earlier article.

  • Sandy P.

    Well, Milton Friedman did say he thought the euro would be a goner in about 10-15 years, but if frankenreich keeps it up, could be sooner.

    Besides, once we start managing those oil-for-food contracts and have the $20++ billion Iraqi euros turned back into greenbacks, all our problems will be solved, yes???

  • S. Weasel

    Damnit, where’s my free stuff?! I been robbed!

  • Indeed, and look at all the free stuff that Weimar Germany got in return for all the quadrillions of marks it printed.

    (Notwithstanding all that, the US does of course gain some economc benefits from being able to print the world’s reserve currency, so this is perhaps one of those “A small grain of truth is completely misunderstood” situations).

    In terms of large scall motivations, this is all crap though. Everyone knows the war is really about antigravity.

  • I just goes to show you, that a little knowledge (e.g. “oil paid in USD”) in the hands of an idiot may be the most dangerous of weapons.

  • Russ Lemley

    David, I want to thank you for making it perfectly clear that the left does not have a monopoly on lunacy.

  • Jacob

    “….the left does not have a monopoly on lunacy.”

    Some time ago Perry made the point that there might be some common ground between libertarians and the left.

  • Jacob: …between SOME libertarians and SOME on the left

  • Bob in Louisville

    I know Ronnie Lieberman. He lives in his Dad’s basement.
    Makes greeting cards that open up with silver balloon hearts that say “I love you.” Seriously.