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If you had bought $1000 worth of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now
be worth $49. With Enron, you would have $16.50 of the original $1,000.
With Worldcom, you would have less than $5 left. If you had bought $1,000 worth of Budweiser (the beer, not the stock) one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the 10 cent deposit, you would have $214. Based on the above, my current investment advice is to drink beer and recycle.
- Unknown, (via Alexander Baron)

[Editors comments: My only trouble with this advise, oh wise Illuminatus, is the choice of Budweiser. To quote 'Spike' from 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer': "Many American beers are under-rated... this ain't one of them"]