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Fears of instability?

The execution of the once-powerful uncle of North Korean leader Kim Jong-un has rekindled fears of instability in the secretive nuclear-armed state.

Huh? Fears of instability? What. The. Fuck.

Here, oh most vile and dismal of BBC copywriters, let me fix that for you…

The execution of the once-powerful uncle of North Korean leader Kim Jong-un has rekindled hopes of instability in the secretive nuclear-armed state.

Sorted.

28 comments to Fears of instability?

  • Hmm

    Quick! Perry – send them an email; with “hope” being one of their favoured words the idiots might actually “correct” it!

  • Hmm

    PS. I meant to put LOL at the start of that last comment because you really did make me laugh out loud! :)

  • Regional

    In Boganstan the Labor Party executed two Prime Ministers metaphorically speaking in the last six years and Tony Abbott was the gunman on the grassy knoll who whacked both of ‘em.

  • Gene

    Part of what makes articles about NoKo seem surreal to me–apart from the surreal nature of NoKo itself–is the standard mass-media tone of the articles, this one being a perfectly typical example. I know the journos need to try and sound even-handed, in that bland style perfected in the 20th century, but somehow they manage to convert the sheer insanity of that place into a certain normality, and that’s not public service, it’s disservice. Hitchens did not exaggerate when he describes NoKo as a state that has apparently taken Orwell’s 1984 as a blueprint.

    This unfortunate BBC phrase is perfectly in line with the “normalizing” of NoKo that such rote use of language creates.

  • Paul Marks

    Perry even in South Korea the education system has been hard at work teaching the young that the Communist north is not all that bad – and that “compromise” is what is needed. and this line is reflected in the media and in some parts of the (nominally conservative) government of the Republic of Korea.

    Even faced with utterly evil “Norts” straight out of a “Rouge Trooper” cartoon strip – the international establishment (of which the BBC is a tiny part) react in a demented fashion.

    This is because while they do not agree with the methods of the “Democratic People’s Republic” they do agree with its aims – “Social Justice” and so on.

    They (the international establishment) actually have in more in common with the Kim family of North Korea than they do with us.

    I wonder what a polygraph test would show.

    For example if a typical American journalist (or school teacher – or college professor) was asked “would you rather have Comrade Kim as President of the United States – or Senator Rand Paul?”

    They do not support the methods of Comrade Kim – but………

  • Jason

    Yeah, when we need that sort of sub editor, we’ll send out for one. In the meantime, I’d go with the day job.

  • Plamus

    I am sorry if it’s already been linked here, but the official press release from North Korea is just… well, see for yourselves. My favorite part: “However, despicable human scum Jang, who was worse than a dog, perpetrated thrice-cursed acts of treachery in betrayal of such profound trust and warmest paternal love shown by the party and the leader for him.”

  • john in cheshire

    Is that Hope not Hate?

  • Mr Ed

    I have to say that I am amazed at how the Orcish speech of unbridled socialist régimes is rendered into English in such a coherent style when you compare the denounciations from Stalin’s purges, Maoist China and North Korea. Whilst they are three snakes of one lineage, the translation into English from Russian, Chinese and Korea rings remarkably well, although the term ‘thrice-cursed’ seems ‘unSoviet’.

    Did David Miliband go to New York for more than a career change?

    And which British former PM comes to mind with this quote?

    despicable political careerist and trickster.

  • Plamus

    Mr Ed, three bonus jewels of communist propaganda for you, from behind the Iron curtain:

    (Above the entrance of a circus tent) 25 years of exchanges of circus tricks between USSR and Bulgaria!
    (On a highway) Reagan – enemy #1 of Tutrakan municipality!
    (In a chicken farm) Every chicken – an artillery shell into the heart of capitalism!

    You almost have to have lived it to believe it.

  • Runcie Balspune

    “Rouge Trooper” cartoon strip

    Is that the one where his dead comrades are reincarnated as microchips in his lipstick tube and make up mirror?

  • At a recent meeting with some very respectable US Foreign policy types, someone pointed out that in Norkland, every event has two equally plausible and totally opposite explanations.

    So either KDU is in full control and this proves it.

    Or the little twerp is under the thumb of the military and this proves that.

    If it were not so tragic it would be hilarious.

    Poor Norks

  • veryretired

    Years ago, in Haiti, the long-time dictator named “Papa Doc” Duvalier died, and the oligarchs who had swum in his wake for many years got together and installed his son, “Baby Doc”, as the new President for life.

    While the old man was hard as diamond, and as heartless, the baby dictator was a spoiled, fat nothing who posed as the pres for a few years until the regime was overthrown, then absconded to some resort area to live in luxury on the families’ stolen wealth.

    This Kim Jong Doofus is about the same, as was his father, Kim Jong Illness, both inheritors of the old man Kim’s brutal prison state, but neither having any more than nominal power. They could put a stuffed panda bear in that office, and it would have as much power as doofus actually does.

    NK has about as much sovereign actuality as Manchuko did back in the 1930’s, and for similar reasons.

    NK is a wholly owned subsidiary of China, and the leadership maybe gets to decide what to order for lunch, but not much more. As for poor, fat little Doofus, he probably just gets strapped in his high chair and is fed by his nanny.

    The world fell into this bizarre fiction that totally subservient client states were separate entities during the cold war, when the soviet union had fifteen votes at the un for its “separate” republics, and the clients in Eastern Europe were each treated as if they were actual, independent nations instead of colonial provinces.

    This same fiction is being acted out in a few places in the world now, but none are as ludicrous as the pretense that NK is still an independent, sovereign nation.

    In fact, it is nothing more than a rabid attack dog kept on a very short leash by its Chinese masters, and ordered to growl and snap at the US and other antagonists as deemed necessary in Beijing.

  • Paul Marks

    Of course “Papa Doc” came to power as the great enemy of the business owners (especially the large business and farm owners) of Haiti.

    “I know that Paul” – of course you do Sir. But the enemy are always watching – and they twist anything they can.

  • William T Reeves

    I’m squeamish but I’d pay good money to see the execution of the Las Killer Kim. I’d buy the video too.

  • Vinegar Joe

    Kim Jong-un is a reformer……in a “juche” kinda way.

  • Eric

    “However, despicable human scum Jang, who was worse than a dog, perpetrated thrice-cursed acts of treachery in betrayal of such profound trust and warmest paternal love shown by the party and the leader for him.”

    Strategypage says the whole thing may be over foreign bank accounts, which were much larger than Kim realized.

    On the other hand, Kim’s family has always idolized Stalin. Fellow idolizer Saddam’s first act was to have enemies and supporters alike executed if he thought they had the power to threaten him even if they’d always shown themselves to be loyal. It may just be Kim feels the only way to solidify his power base is to execute anyone who isn’t part of it.

  • Julie near Chicago

    Well all I can say is, I’m going to start assiduously studying the publications of the Korean Central News Agency, so as cultivate in the poor soil of my thrice-malnourished brain the ability to write in the eloquent and elegant manner it so magnificently displays in this dispatch.

  • Regional

    Julie,
    Just take drugs or get pissed and stay pissed.

  • PersonFromPorlock

    Vinegar Joe
    December 15, 2013 at 2:47 am

    Kim Jong-un is a reformer……in a “juche” kinda way.

    Revealed! VJ is actually Hillary Clinton! ;^)

  • jamess

    veryretired,

    This incident: http://www.cbsnews.com/news/china-boat-captain-says-hijackers-were-in-north-korea-military-uniforms-in-latest-incident-to-stoke-tensions/ left Chinese feeling pretty bitter about NK.

    The idea that NK is firmly under China’s thumb strikes me as fairly implausible, it’s much more likely that North Korea is a crazy country that China is desperate to keep intact so that:
    a) they’re not inundated with NK refugees
    b) they not directly bordering a country with close ties to America

    Putting to death a guy who (as far as I can work out) was trying to implement the limited market reforms that made such a big difference to China doesn’t strike me as something that was orchastrated in China.

  • Jacob

    Speaking of NK – reminds me that Clinton made a deal with them, under which they were supposed to renounce the Bomb. Further deals were made by presidents Bush and Obama.

    This, apropos Obama’s pledge: “Iran will not be allowed to get the bomb”.

  • veryretired

    jamess—I’m sorry, but I heard this song so many times about so many “indigenous revolutionary movements” and all those stubbornly independent socialist people’s states that just happened to always support the su on every significant issue, and 99% of the minor ones, I just can’t hum along with it any more.

    NK was a soviet creature until that monstrosity collapsed, and then was picked up by the Chinese. You can dredge up all the big reasons they’re different from the Chinese you can find, it doesn’t change the way that mentality operates.

    Behind every nk cadre, whatever the rank, is a Chinese handler, and the final decision is never made by any of the nk puppets. And just because nk farted once and China frowned doesn’t mean as much as you seem to think it means.

    They are China’s East Germany, or Cuba—a handy little irritant to have available to give the other side an occasional hot foot.

    Some time in the not-too-distant future, when the house of cards that is the new China folds up, and it will, I hope you won’t be too upset when the archives are opened, and the real story comes out.

  • Paul Marks

    veryretired.

    A change in the “Mandate of Heaven” in China?

    I hope you are right Sir.

    The PRC is a modern Nazi Germany – not of the early 1940s but of the 1930s.

    An efficient state (after the manner of Frederick the Great – not the farcical statism of people such as Colbert in France) which allows private enterprise as-long-as it is utterly at the disposal of the goal of National Greatness (including Han Chinese racism).

    But the People’s Republic of China is vastly bigger than Nazi Germany was – and Western countries such as Britain are vastly less capable of manufacturing industry than they were in the 1930s (that comes as a surprise to people who have believed the propaganda about Britain in the 1930s).

    If there is not a change in the “Mandate of Heaven” in China – the PRC will be a threat to the entire world.

  • veryretired

    Paul—I’ve been listening to all the hype about China for decades, and especially since reforms after the fall of the gang of 4 opened up the economy, and I just don’t see the ultra-powerful new superstar so many others are seeing.

    For all its progress, and that has certainly been impressive, the country is still being run as an oligarchical dictatorship, with all the inevitable corruption and mistaken policies that that type of structure has by definition.

    China is a boiling pot of unrest and distrust, fueled by the endless stupidities and cupidities inherent in any socialist state. None of the statistics they release are believable, their banking system is a ticking bomb that will make Japan’s meltdown look like a minor case of monetary indigestion, and their ruling elites are even more corrupt and clueless than ours, which is really saying something.

    The Chinese people are extraordinarily entrepeneurial and industrious, and, if they were ever unleashed, might climb to the leading position their population and ancient culture would seem to indicate they are capable of achieving, but as long as they are held back and endlessly exploited by the party, with its cadres relentlessly stealing everything they can get their hands on, they simply cannot reach their full potential.

    We look at our abysmal leadership class and despair over their incompetence and corruption. Well, China’s is just as bad or worse, as they have even less restraints on them by law and custom as our bunch of quacks do.

    Yes, they will huff and puff, and threaten to blow our house down, but it is their own house of cards that is constantly teetering, even more precariously than our own shaky edifice.

    We live in interesting times, huh?

  • Rich Rostrom

    Huh? Fears of instability? What. The. Fuck.

    It’s the “nuclear-armed” part that makes it scary. The end of the abominable NorK regime is devoutly to be wished – but the mad dogs could inflict some horrific bites in the death spasm.

    Paul Marks @ December 16, 2013 at 9:13 am:

    The PRC is a modern Nazi Germany – not of the early 1940s but of the 1930s.

    There is a certain element of National Bolshevism in the present PRC government. But where the Nazis imposed corporatism (out of fascist ideological conviction), the PRC has renounced socialist ideology, privatized most of what was a totally state-owned economy, and created an enormous thriving private sector.

    The position may be similar, but the direction is opposite.

  • Mr Ed

    Meanwhile in what was once East Prussia, Russian nukes may be being sited. Is this more ‘stability’, the same, or less? It looks like game playing to me.

  • Paul Marks

    veryretired – the Chinese banking system. I have heard things – but I just do not know.

    We shall see.